Thursday, 29 November 2007


By SM07

+15°C / 59°F
This is as warm as it gets in Sweden, so we'll start here.
People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves.
The Swedes are out in the sun, getting a tan.

+10°C / 50°F
The French are trying in vain to start their central heating.
The Swedes plant flowers in their gardens.

+5°C / 41°F
Italian cars won't start.
The Swedes are cruising in cabriolets.
You can see your breath.

0°C / 32°F
Distilled water freezes.
The water in Oslo Fjord gets a little thicker.

-5°C / 23°F
People in California almost freeze to death.
The Swedes have their final barbecue before winter.
Consortium begin to worry about the homeless Spacemasters.
French cars won't start anymore.

-10°C / 14°F
The Brits start the heat in their houses.
The Swedes start using long sleeves.
You can hear your breath.
Consortium begin to talk about the homeless Spacemasters.
British cars don't start.

-20°C / -4°F
The Aussies flee from Mallorca.
The Swedes end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.
Spacemasters actually started to build their own snowcaves by themselves.
You need jumper cables to get the car going

-30°C / -22°F
People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth.
You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo
The Swedes start drying their laundry indoors.
German cars don't start
Eyes freeze shut when you blink

-40°C / -40°F
Paris start cracking in the cold.
Swedes close the bathroom window
Consortium actually do something about the few frozen homeless Spacemasters.
Japanese cars don't start

-50°C / -58°F >
Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole.
The Swede army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.
Too cold to think
You need jumper cables to get the driver going

-70°C / -94°F
The false Santa moves south along with polar bears.
The Swede army goes out on winter survival training.
You plan a two week hot bath
Sweetish cars don't start

-183°C / -297.4°F
Microbes in food don't survive.
The Swede cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.
Your car helps you plan your trip South

-273°C / -459.4°F
ALL atom-based movent halts.
The Swedes start saying "Faen, it's cold outside today."
You can see your last breath, farewell, all SMs!

-300°C / -508°F
Hell freezes over, Sweden wins the Best Student accommodation contest.